


A Perfect Recruit

by stew (julie)



Category: The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1996-01-01
Updated: 1996-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:08:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22302382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/julie/pseuds/stew
Summary: Buckaroo is visiting an old friend of his father’s when he meets a provocative young man who seems to have only one thing on his mind. It’s soon clear that there’s far more to him than that, though.
Relationships: Buckaroo Banzai/Perfect Tommy
Comments: 2
Kudos: 1





	A Perfect Recruit

**Author's Note:**

> **Notes:** I always love origin stories, and when it comes to _Banzai_ fandom that translates to considering how Buckaroo recruits his team. Here’s one version of how Buckaroo might have met Perfect Tommy…
> 
>  **First published:** in my zine “Samurai Errant: Cavalier Tales Quixotic and Profane” #5 on 1 January 1996

# A Perfect Recruit

♦

The alley that led to Dan’s building was, as ever, dim and airless and peopled with every variety of fabulous. Buckaroo took his customary deep breath and grinned, as he left one of the busiest streets in the Village for this other-world. ‘Hey, Buckaroo,’ a few of the regulars greeted him.

‘Hey,’ he replied easily, calling them each by name.

On a doorstep there sat a male figure, his long legs bent, his elbows each resting on a knee, his face in darkness. As Buckaroo passed, a match flared as the man lit a cigarette, briefly illuminating his face and hair. Buckaroo stopped in his tracks.

Laconically, once he realized he had an audience, the figure slowly stretched up to his full height. Standing on the doorstep gave him the advantages of height and concealing shadow. A long moment passed as the man took an unhurried drag on his cigarette and exhaled. ‘Looking for a good time?’ A standard formula delivered in bored tones. Though maybe the voice carried a hint of reluctant interest.

‘No.’ Buckaroo smiled.

The other man shrugged: Buckaroo was obviously interested in something. ‘It’s the same charge for watching.’

‘I’d better not ask you to step into the light, then.’

Another shrug. He took the step down to Buckaroo’s level, and leaned nonchalantly against the wall. Of a height, each gazed steadily at the other. ‘Get an eyeful while you can. Guess I’m feeling generous.’

‘Thank you.’

‘What are you here for, if not a good time?’

‘Visiting a friend.’ If the other made any assumptions, they were cut short by the firm look in Buckaroo’s eye. ‘My name’s Buckaroo.’

‘Tom.’

‘Goodnight, then, Tom. Nice meeting you.’

A smirk. ‘Yeah, it was, wasn’t it? Maybe when you’re done visiting…?’

‘I doubt my finances would allow me, even if I felt so inclined.’

‘You feel inclined,’ Tom told him with great assurance. Buckaroo found to his surprise that this was true. ‘I’m sure we could come to some arrangement.’

Buckaroo nodded politely. ‘Thank you for the offer. All the same –’

Tom shrugged and turned away, and Buckaroo continued up the alley to the block of flats where his old friend Dan lived. ‘How are you, Daniel-san?’

‘Surviving, barely surviving.’

‘Sure, Dan.’ Buckaroo hugged him in greeting. The older man returned his embrace as strongly as ever. Buckaroo had a suspicion that Dan had been in love with Masado Banzai, and that he was therefore overly fond of Masado’s only son. ‘What have you been up to?’ Buckaroo asked. ‘How’s tricks?’

‘He asks me how’s tricks. Buckaroo, dear child, I haven’t turned a trick since well before you were a sparkle in your father’s eye.’

This banter had become comfortable habit. Dan made a pot of tea and they settled down to catch up on all the news and gossip.

Over the second pot of tea, Dan leaned forward and tapped Buckaroo’s knee. This always preceded a serious topic. ‘I’ve a favor to ask you, young man.’

‘Yes, Daniel-san?’

‘There’s a boy moved into the next flat. Down on his luck, though he won’t admit it. He’s working the streets, but he’s worth better than that. Not that anyone would mind paying him for a roll – I’ve even considered swallowing my pride and smashing my piggy bank. He’ll probably make a fortune out of all us jaded queens. But he’s not the type.’

‘Does he think he has no other options right now?’

‘There’s been some trouble with the law – overseas, I believe. He’s a smart lad. Incredibly smart, if you ask me and, believe it or not, I can usually tell.’

‘I know you can, Dan.’ Buckaroo smiled. ‘So what’s the favor?’

‘I invited him up here to meet you. If he’s as brilliant as I think he is…’

‘You want me to take him back to the Institute.’

‘Just until he finds his feet again. I do believe he’d feel right at home with your gaggle of misfits.’ Dan looked his most supplicating. ‘For me, just talk to him. But for him, you might want to help.’

‘You know there’s no need to put that face on, Dan. Of course I’ll talk to him.’

‘In that case, darling, I’ll get the bottle of champers.’

Buckaroo laughed. ‘I’ve earned it have I?’

Within minutes of the bottle being placed in an ice bucket, and three matching glasses being found, there was a knock at the door. ‘Speak of the devil,’ Dan quipped. ‘Always times his entrances. _And_ he always sneaks up on you like that – I heard _you_ coming up the stairs. Gives me a few moments’ notice to rearrange my coiffure.’

By the end of Dan’s monologue, he had welcomed his neighbor in with a hug, and shut the door behind him. Buckaroo had stood, and now he smiled. ‘Hello, Tom.’

‘You know each other already?’ Dan looked from one to the other with an exasperated smile on his face.

‘I got him interested,’ Tom declared. ‘He was seriously considering blowing his bank account for me.’ The young man stood, loose and confident, one hip cocked.

‘We met in the alley on my way here,’ Buckaroo explained, amending the story slightly.

‘So sit down, sit down, both of you. I spent all my pension on some bubbles. Tommy, would you do the honors?’

Tom walked over to where Buckaroo now sat, and put a firm hand around the neck of the champagne bottle. With his deep brown eyes on Buckaroo, every move became a sexual allusion. Propping the base of the bottle against one hip, he took his time disposing of the foil and wire, and ever so slowly popping the cork. At the sudden bang and the rush of champagne, Dan groaned. Buckaroo sat smiling, amused and appreciative. Tom filled the glasses and passed them round.

Dan took a long mouthful. ‘Well, _darling_ , that was all very lovely, but we’re stony broke. We weren’t counting on a floor show.’

Bowing, Tom said, ‘It’s on the house tonight, gentlemen.’

‘I have been _dying_ for you to say that…’

‘Don’t let your imagination run away with you, Danny.’ Tom sprawled elegantly on the sofa opposite Buckaroo. ‘So how come you know someone so stylish, Dan?’

‘His father was a very good friend of mine, years ago now.’ Dan of course could be relied on to reminisce for anything up to half an hour at a moment’s notice. The two younger men appraised each other at length. Buckaroo couldn’t help liking what he saw: Tom was long and slim and muscled; his hair was bleached blond, emphasizing his dark eyes; the tattered jeans, shirt and bulky leather jacket drew attention to the fine face and hands and figure; the self-assured attitude was not unbecoming, nor totally unjustified. ‘But you’re not here to listen to me talk,’ Dan finally concluded.

‘No?’ asked Tom. ‘What, then?’

‘I’m meddling again. Tom, darling, Buckaroo might be a useful person for you to know. If you worked at the Banzai Institute for a while, it might give you a fresh start.’

‘Why do I need a fresh start? I’m doing fine where I am.’

‘I couldn’t help but think,’ Dan said carefully, ‘that you might not be on the streets out of choice.’

‘Of course I am. Easy way to make some dough. I attract the best clientele. What’s your problem?’

‘You’re educated and intelligent. You deserve better than this life.’

Tom stood, seemed about to walk out. ‘Dan, you’ve been a friend. But don’t think that gives you the right to tell me who I am or what I shouldn’t do.’

‘I just want the best for you.’

‘So you want to set me up with this guy? He couldn’t afford me, in more ways than the obvious.’

‘Don’t get angry, Tom. I’m not trying to set you up – I just figured you and Buckaroo might be able to help each other.’

‘Forget it. I never asked you to look out for me.’

At this, Dan stood as well. ‘If there’s no one to look out for you, you’ll end up in real trouble. With your smart mouth, and your cocky attitude – you’re gonna offend someone real bad one day. And you know what happens then? I’ve seen it a hundred times. No one cares about a street kid – they’ll just snuff you out. Have your looks ruined, maybe lose your life, get you hooked on something nasty. It won’t always be as easy as this for you. The world’s not there waiting at your feet.’

Tom stood stock still, staring Dan down, breathing as hard as if he’d been in a physical fight. ‘You know I wouldn’t let anyone else say those things to me, Danny?’

‘I know. That’s why I had to, darling.’

Tom turned his back on them, walked to stare out of the window. Finally he said, ‘I need the money. I can’t use my real name, I can’t get a legitimate job. I sure as hell prefer walking the streets to cleaning them.’

Buckaroo asked, ‘What sort of work do you want? What’s your field?’

Shrugging, Tom said, ‘In an ideal world? Math, abstract and practical applications. Computers. Physics.’

‘In that case, _you_ can help _me_. I need people with knowledge of those fields at the Institute. I can only offer you a small salary and full board, but if that’s the work you want, I can give it to you. In fact, I need your expertise more than you need me.’

‘I’ll think about it,’ was the grudging reply.

Dan looked overjoyed at this, obviously assuming the result of Tom’s thinking was a foregone conclusion. ‘Come and finish your champagne, Tommy. This is a night for celebrations.’

‘Yeah?’ The younger man seemed skeptical, but he sat down again and took up his glass. ‘How do you figure that? I haven’t earned a brass razoo tonight, and my rent’s due.’

‘Seeing as I’m your landlord, I may just give you an extension. In return for that amazing floor show. I should obviously buy champagne more often.’

‘It’s not just the rent – there’s food and clothes and insignificant little things like that. I only had one chance tonight, and he won’t even admit he was interested, let alone ask me to do anything he might pay for.’

Buckaroo slowly smiled. ‘Do you want me to admit I find you attractive? Because I do.’

‘I should think so. The way you just stopped in your tracks when you saw me.’

‘It was quite a show you put on, lighting your cigarette. The sort of thing one notices.’

‘You hung around to get a good look.’

‘I know a lot of people here; I wanted to make your acquaintance, too.’

Tom smirked. ‘You sure copped an eyeful while you were making it.’

‘Agreed. But I still can’t afford your services.’

Tom lifted a dark brow. ‘You’ve done me a favor, coming here tonight. So what can I do for you in return?’

Dan said, ‘Buckaroo doesn’t ask for anything in return. He’s a generous soul. Plus,’ Dan added, sighing, ‘like his father, he’s as straight as they come.’

‘I specialize in seductions,’ Tom purred. His casual posture indicated that he didn’t need to press his advantage.

‘Let him be, Tom. He wants to be your friend,’ Dan chided, ‘he wants to help, and all you think of is sex.’ 

‘You can hardly blame me, Dan. Doesn’t he look enticing?’ Tom took a long swallow of champagne. ‘On the house, as I said.’

‘Tom, get your mind out of the gutter.’

‘It’s not in the gutter – it’s sliding around in my bed with white satin skin and long fine legs.’

Though Buckaroo’s expression remained mildly amused, Dan was getting annoyed. ‘One of your problems, Tommy, is taking everything too far. Swallow your pride for once. You might have the hottest ass down in the alley right now, but that doesn’t mean you can seduce everyone you lay your eyes on.’

Tom’s temper was on as short a fuse as Dan’s. ‘He already admitted he finds me attractive.’

‘So what? You are – anyone would be blind not to notice. But that doesn’t give you leave to harass Buckaroo.’

‘Maybe I want something on _my_ terms. I don’t like taking charity.’

Buckaroo’s calm words cut through the rising voices. ‘So you do me the charity of seducing me in return for my charity of offering you work.’

Tom had the grace to look humbled by this. As the young man sat down again, Dan heaved a sigh and headed towards the kitchen. ‘I do believe another pot of tea is called for.’

‘It’s not a charity,’ Tom said.

‘Which isn’t?’

‘Both,’ was the grudging reply.

‘Come back to the Institute with me tonight. You can’t leave yourself behind, but you can leave this situation.’

Tom moved to crouch by Buckaroo’s feet. ‘No, stay here with me tonight. I’ll go to the Institute with you tomorrow.’

‘If that’s a deal, then I’m not interested.’

‘No?’ Tom tried a winningly innocent look.

‘I don’t recruit like that, believe it or not.’

‘I believe it.’ Tom grabbed one of Buckaroo’s hands in his. ‘Do me the charity of sleeping with me tonight. For no other reason than that you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in too long a while.’

Buckaroo smiled shyly. ‘For that reason, maybe I would.’

Dan returned, tray of tea makings in hand, just in time to hear Tom’s incredulous, _‘Maybe?’_ The blond sat next to Buckaroo on the sofa, stretched out beside him. ‘You’re a hard nut to crack, that’s no lie.’

Buckaroo watched him. They weren’t touching, but if Buckaroo turned, they’d fall together, one lovely length against the other. ‘People don’t usually say no to you?’

‘They don’t even say maybe. Usually.’

‘Live and learn, kid,’ was Dan’s contribution.

‘So what kind of work do you have for me?’ Tom asked.

‘Something my parents were working on. We can talk about it tomorrow. I think it might interest you, but it would sound a little unlikely after a glass of champagne.’

‘Yeah.’ Tom swallowed the tea Dan had poured him, and put his cup down. ‘Come and help me put a few things together.’

‘All right.’ Buckaroo smiled. ‘I’ll say goodnight, Daniel-san.’

‘Goodnight, dear.’ Dan gave him an unusually long hug in farewell. ‘Take care.’

‘You, too, Dan.’ And Buckaroo followed Tom down the hall to his door. ‘We can come and collect the rest of your gear later, if you decide to stay on.’

‘Yeah, I only need a few things right now.’ Tom held the door open for Buckaroo, and closed and locked it behind them. Buckaroo found himself in a corner, escape route blocked by Tom. ‘And one of the things I need right now…’

Buckaroo smiled shyly, backed up against a wall. ‘Need?’ he queried.

‘Oh yeah.’ Tom crept a little closer. ‘So beautiful,’ he murmured.

Leaning his head back, arms hanging loose by his sides, Buckaroo closed his eyes. Abstaining from choice, or maybe silently assenting. Tom stepped forward. Kissed him passionately on the mouth, hands clutching briefly at Buckaroo’s shoulders, his arms, his waist.

‘So beautiful.’

Eventually Buckaroo opened his eyes again. Tom watched him, and Buckaroo didn’t avoid his gaze. Buckaroo felt pale and light-headed, knew his hands were shaking. ‘Congratulations on another conquest,’ Buckaroo whispered.

‘No.’ Tom took a step back. ‘No way – Look at you! No way you’re just a conquest.’ He ran a wondering hand along Buckaroo’s face. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

‘I’m running a fever,’ Buckaroo said with a gentle desperate laugh.

Tom was all confusion. ‘Are you ill?’

‘People don’t usually fall for you?’

‘They don’t even care.’

‘Crazy of them. Or maybe it’s me that needs a little craziness in my life right now.’

A cocksure grin returned to Tom’s face. ‘You want a little craziness…’ He pulled Buckaroo into his arms. ‘Let me at you!’

Buckaroo moaned, letting himself be gathered up in an enthusiastic embrace. With Tom’s lips burning across his mouth and cheeks and throat, Buckaroo felt a curious combination of heaviness and light-headedness. His limbs grew drowsy, his blood pulsed slowly, his cock throbbed hungrily. In contrast, his mind floated free and easy, singing with some vast angelic choir. ‘How much,’ he gasped, ‘do you charge for this?’

Drawing back, Tom gazed at the man in his arms, something that might have been wariness returning to his eyes. ‘I thought you said –’ But in a moment Tom’s face was the cool mask it had been in the alley.

‘Don’t stop now,’ Buckaroo said. Tom obediently bent to kiss him again, though now his lips were cold. It wasn’t long before Buckaroo stirred restlessly. ‘What’s wrong, Tom?’

‘Don’t worry,’ the man replied smoothly. He pulled away. ‘Come on, the bedroom’s this way.’

‘Wait!’ Buckaroo grabbed his hand. ‘What changed?’

‘I thought you – Well, it’s been a while since someone wanted to –’ Tom’s free hand stretched across his forehead, hiding his eyes, fingers digging into his temples. ‘I don’t believe this.’

‘Tell me.’

‘I guess I was wrong anyway.’

‘Say it, Tom.’

And in an overly brash voice and a false laugh, the man said, ‘I thought you might want to make love to me.’

‘I want to make love _with_ you, Tom. Don’t doubt me.’ Buckaroo smiled. ‘No, I’m too nervous. Maybe _you_ should make love to _me_.’

Tom’s confidence returned, masking any lingering uncertainties. ‘Nervous?’ He gathered Buckaroo into his arms, practiced and sure. ‘We can deal with that.’

‘Wait, though. There’s something I should say first.’

‘I know. When you go back to the Institute tomorrow, you return to Real Life and pretend this never happened.’ Tom’s grin became a little ironic, but didn’t fade.

‘That’s not quite it. Can we sit down for a minute?’

‘Sure. It’s very uncivilized of me to seduce you in my doorway.’ Tom led the way over to his cushion-scattered sofa.

Buckaroo sat close by Tom, and held both of his hands in his own. ‘There’s a woman –’

‘I know, I know. I’ll be cool.’

‘Let me say it, Tom. Let me tell you how I feel.’

‘OK,’ Tom said, shrugging grudgingly and not meeting Buckaroo’s eyes.

‘Peggy works at the Institute. She knows I want to marry her, but she’s taking her time, and I’m happy to wait. We’re not even dating. But I love her dearly – everyone does. You’ll understand when you meet her, she’s a very special person. You won’t change my mind about her, you won’t change how I love her.’ Tom tried to pull away. Buckaroo explained, ‘I’m not just saying this to hurt you.’

‘Don’t sweat it.’

‘I’ve fallen for you, Tom. I’m more than a little in love with you, you’ve cast quite a glamour over me. I wanted to explain that if it wasn’t for Peggy – But once you meet her, you won’t resent her.’

Tom was watching him closely again. ‘What are you telling me?’

‘That I’d offer you my love if I could. That you deserve love, you deserve to be loved.’

‘I’d take up that offer,’ Tom whispered.

‘Now, if you don’t want me to stay the night after all, I’d understand.’

‘Are you crazy?’ Tom’s hands gripped Buckaroo’s so tightly that Buckaroo’s fingers lost all feeling. The grin grew broad and happy and genuine. ‘Let me have your love, just until tomorrow morning.’

‘It’s yours.’ And Buckaroo leaned forward for Tom’s kiss.

♦


End file.
